If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time, you’ll probably know there are a few things I’m rather passionate about. Music, great writing, history, education, science, compassion, travel… these all hold special places in my heart. Bigger things, challenges, growth, introspection, and the psychology behind so many things we experience along our paths also enthrall me. I’d love to be a fly on the wall of humanity, witnessing the ways in which we live, interact with each other, think of and define ourselves, react and relate to people and events, and why every one of us is so very different. To watch our minds’ internal hardwirings mesh with our hearts’ deepest emotions, combine with the global supporting cast, and see the endless dramatic possibilities play out on the stage that is our lifetime.
Gravitation is one of the fundamentals of nature (I did say ‘science’…), in which objects with mass attract one another. But I think the same philosophy can also be applied to our interpersonal relationships – applied to that global cast of characters that have starring roles at various stages in our life. I like to think people come in and out of our lives being gravitationally pulled in and out of each other’s orbit, in an elaborate dance orchestrated by the Universe, only learning the steps as we go. Sometimes we try and make it work – just because the person has arrived in our life, we automatically think we’re supposed to have some sort of relationship with them – but I think certain people are placed in our lives to teach us lessons, not just to befriend.
Interpersonal relationships and their subsequent timing, strengthening, weakening, death and resurrection absolutely fascinate me. I’m a firm believer that everything in life has its right time for happening, and a lot of personal frustration can stem from wanting to have control over when things happen in our life rather than having faith that they will, when they’re supposed to. This can happen with wanting the right job, the right house, the right friends, the right partner… we grow up with this notion that by a certain age, we should have certain things, and if they haven’t happened yet, we go into panic mode. We start believing there must be something wrong with ourselves, especially when surrounded by Things Happening for Everyone Else, and it’s natural to start comparing ourselves. We become frustrated and start delving into action plans, trying to take control over something the Universe will ultimately provide when the timing is right. I believe there are lessons that need to be learned before certain things can happen. These lessons will only get more pronounced and more difficult if we don’t take the hint the first time around, and will ultimately end up being those Major Life Lessons we look back on sometimes as turning points – times when things started to turn around.I’ve had a couple of instances of this in my life, the biggest probably being the lesson of learning to have some sort of self-worth. Going through a string of awful boyfriends in my late teens/early twenties; people who lied, cheated, became emotionally and physically abusive, that I continued to stay with because I didn’t feel I was worth any better. I honestly thought I’d be better off taking what I could get, even it if put me at risk, because it’d be better than being alone. I want to take my younger self and give her a good shaking for allowing this to happen, but you know what? I had to go through it because it was a lesson I needed to learn. The Universe had hinted at it with the first Bad Boyfriend, hinted a little harder with the next, and slapped me in the face with it with the final one when I ended up questioned by the police about how I’d been treated, and spending a chunk of time in the hospital. If that’s not a sign I needed to change things, I don’t know what is. But it was the wanting to have control that made it get to that point. Lesson learned, however, and once I’d learned that I had to start believing I was worth more, and set some standards for what’s acceptable, then I was delivered an incredible man who’s helped me grow, believe in myself, and I’ll be marrying in seven weeks’ time.
The other big lesson is one I still believe I’m learning. Do you ever have people in your life who keep showing up, when you wish you could close the door on them and never have to see or hear about them again? People from the past who’ve hurt you, old flames, former friends, people who define you by who you were when you knew them, refuse to see the person you’ve become, and just keep showing up? It’s frustrating. You see their face somewhere and you want to ask the Universe why – why are they still here when all I want to do is move on? The interwoven fabrics of our social networks, especially in the day and age of the Internet, can make this especially hard, and just because you’ve moved on from one relationship doesn’t mean everyone else in both parties’ networks feels the same way. So what’s the lesson here? Lately, I’ve come to the realisation that the Universe is trying to teach me the lesson of acceptance. Allowing things to be, without reacting to them, without getting frustrated, defensive or annoyed. Accepting the situation that this person still exists and you may bump into them every once in a while, and that’s okay. Let go of frustration, because you know what?
Who cares. This was what a good friend told me a couple of weeks ago when I started fretting about something I couldn’t control. Who cares? Nobody. Nobody at all cares, and if you’ve moved on from a relationship with someone, it doesn’t matter if they still show their face every once in a while. Yes, it would be nice if once doors had been closed on bad relationships, you never had to be reminded of them again, but the reality proves otherwise. You have no control over it, so just accept that they’re here, without getting exasperated about it. Accept that you’ve become a better person since, and it doesn’t matter what the other party thinks, because they’re not in your life any more. There will always be people who’ll talk. People who’ll never move on from the chapter in which your lives intersected. People will be pulled in and out of your gravitational orbit for some reason or another, and you may not want them to. But that’s okay. As long as you make the choice to live the life you want, make the right choices, be the best person you can be, grow from experiences, let go of the past, and focus on making the present the best you can, that’s all you can control. I think I’m learning this lesson as we speak – and I’m already feeling a whole lot better.
Hear that, Universe?
I agree, and I think that by experiencing bad experiences with people or life it allows us to realize the great things in our lives. Once we know the bad things, we can appreciate the great things…not that it’s fun to have to experience bad things, but I agree that they are important and that we have to learn and move on.
It’s just making that CHOICE to learn and move on – sometimes people hang on to that baggage thinking it’s just part of them, and they were wronged and hurt etc. and it can cause bitterness – I am just such a huge advocate for learning from things in the past and then leaving them there. Nobody has to drag them around with them.
i love the “who cares” outlook. so simple but so effective, your friend is a wise one! you’re right em, alot of the time ppl or things happen to us and we throw temper tantrums when they don’t go our way not realizing that they were put there to teach us a lesson. i know i’ve been guilty of that but you’re so right in pointing out that ANYTHING can be framed as a lesson if you decide to learn from it & move on. though it is quite annoying when you keep seeing someone you don’t want to lol, but i love your outlook of acceptance.
Haha my friend is a wise one indeed, I think he told me that while I was in a fit of tears and it was just like a shining light on the situation and made everything better. A lot of times the way we react to and think about a situation is far more exaggerated than it is in real life!
Man, Emily…I wish I was as wise as you are when I was your age (it took you only half the time to learn what I’ve learned in my almost 50 years!)…I still need to work on that “Who cares?” thing…
Awww thank you Wendy, your words really mean a lot. I still feel like I have a long way to go, and I really appreciate your words of encouragement along the way 🙂
You have learned already lessons that took me a lot longer. A lot.
It’s all so true though. It seems to me that life gets a whole lot easier when we accept what is, and ask what we need to learn.
Thank you Jenny! 🙂
I almost wrote a post similar to this for today but ended up going with the one I wrote. I think this is a huge huge huge thing for me, and I found it at an important time. When we believe that the universe has this agenda for us, it’s hard to sit back and not try to figure out how to reshape our lives to fit someone back into it, but deep down I know you’re right. It’s hard to hear, but you’re so right.
We talk a lot about this at work. About our need to have control, and how hard it is to just accept and have faith. It’s difficult, but kind of comforting, I think too.
I love this idea of “who cares”—because, ultimately, the only people who do care at day’s end (and who we should care about in turn) are those we love. The others? In the words of e.e.cummings, “Let them go, dear.”
Great words 🙂
Well written Emily. This is a lesson I keep getting blasted at me from time to time. I think this time I may have really learned it. I’ve strived for years to become an artist of life. The art of letting go is one I’ve yet to master. I’m working on it.
I think it’s a lesson that’s never truly going to go away simply because it’s so valuable to keep on practicing. And, as with most things that are worth sticking at, practice makes perfect 🙂
One of my favorite quotes is from a book I read a few years ago called Prep:
“There are people we treat wrong, and later, we’re prepared to treat other people right. Perhaps this sounds mercenary, but I feel grateful for these trial relationships, and I would like to think it all evens out – surely, unknowingly, I have served as practice for other people.”
This post totally reminds me of that.
That’s a great excerpt – not only are other people practice for us, but we can totally unknowingly be practice for other people, too. I’d never even thought of it that way, but it’s a really interesting way of looking at things. Even if someone hurt us in the past, hopefully THEY have learned from it, and somehow we’ve helped someone further along THEIR path. Thanks for sharing!!
Well said girl. Very brave to put this out there too. I know I run into people in real life and online that I’d rather not and I get so worked up over seeing them unexpecteldy that I really stress myself out! I love the lesson of “Who Cares”. Because it’s so true!!! Things are usually way worse in our own heads than they are in real life!
Also while I’m here may I just point out what a fabulous writer you are!
Awww you’re too sweet!! Thank you so much, you made my day 🙂
I don’t think I could possibly agree with you more. Especially that last paragraph.
I mean, there is a MySpace topic specifically about “me” and how much people disliked me back in my “chat room” days, and how much of a toolbox they thought I was after looking at my profile. When I stumbled upon it, I was really bothered and frustrated that people were still thinking/talking about it in the first place, but then I looked at the posting dates. It had been over 3 years since anyone posted to the topic (which was still 5+ years after all the “stuff” went down, but still). I had to realize that it was MY issue, and that I just needed to let it go.
The only contention I have is that you eluded to abuse becoming a learning experience. There is no excuse for abuse, and regardless of something positive coming out of it, you didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Don’t get me wrong, I am glad you are still around to look back and realize what you went through has shaped you, but that in no way/shape/form justifies it. I’m not just saying this for your benefit; I felt it needed to be said because no one deserves to be abused. It is abhorrent, unacceptable behavior, and it should be eradicated wherever it is found.
Anyway, yes, the Universe is a funny place. I’m glad you and Steph have hit it off as friends. She is absolutely hilarious, and a fantastic photographer.
I’d be interested to hear about this chapter of events!! It sounds like I’ve experienced something similar – only recently, I found the sister of an ex (actually the one I was talking about abuse-wise) had crossed paths with a friend of mine, and was STILL talking about what a ‘psycho’ I was to anyone who’d listen, and had actually gone so far as to create a fake Facebook, with stolen pictures of me, pretending to BE me slamming her on FB to “prove” how awful I was. And this is almost 4 years after her brother and I parted ways!! Some people just cannot let go and move on… I guess when you cling onto something long enough it forms such a big part of your identity you don’t know who you’d be without it. Which is really sad, when you look at it like that.
I’m glad you introduced me to Steph too. I love finding people that are passionate about music too 🙂
Oh, I’m sure I’ll tell you all about it at some point, purely to revel/wallow in my own past “learning experiences.” Sometimes it’s hard to reconcile the fact that I’ve been “online” for 17+ years at this point. I’ve sort of seen it all, but the story really hasn’t been “told.” (yes, I misuse quotes a lot)
You’ve been fake-Facebooked? That is just mind-boggling. Then again, it’s like you say; some people just can’t let things go. Not that you or I are perfect by any standard, but seriously? I mean, I’m guilty of quite a few things, but I don’t believe I’ve publicly defaced someone (other than myself, of course) so blatantly and creepily. We’ve moved into an age where people can take stalking to a whole new level, and I’m afraid that it’s just going to get worse–particularly if people don’t have the self-confidence to overcome it.
1. We must Skype at some point!
2. A topic tackled at another time, perhaps? *Blog hint* 🙂
You’re such a hippie. haha…just kidding. Well, I am too, actually.
Great post again! It’s interesting that forgiveness is a theme that is present in every major religion and every culture…because humans are not supposed to hold onto that intense anger!
Sometimes I wish I could take away past mistakes, but you’re right, they taught me a lesson. And if I hadn’t made the mistake then, I would have maybe been making it now.
I’ll work on just letting it be, and moving on… 🙂
A hippie!! LOL there really is a first time for everything!! Haha 😀
I think forgiveness is a topic best tackled separately… it’s something I have big issues with. Not in the act of forgiving itself, but in its place in religion like you said, and certain people preaching themselves silly about this religion or that all the while not able to forgive… it seems so hypocritical to me. Can you tell I have a bit of a sore spot here? lol
Letting things be, and moving on, is easier said than done a lot of times, but ultimately, why drag around things that would be better left in the past?
I have such a hard time with this, too. I suck at accepting things for what they are and choosing to be ok with something I can’t control. Also with the fact that some people aren’t meant to be in our lives for their duration. It’s tough to learn and deal with.
It is really tough sometimes. Right now I’m wondering what happened to the people that used to follow my blog and comment on everything I wrote – there was a whole group of people who seem to have all moved on together and stopped reading. Which is tough to accept – but I have to keep reminding myself that maybe they were only in my “blog life” for a chapter to teach me HOW to blog, and to learn about networking and making relationships etc. And now I know what I want to write about, maybe it doesn’t fit in any more. But that’s okay, because it leaves room for people that do. When you choose to let go of something that isn’t working for you any more, and causes more harm than good, then it leaves room for better things to move in. It is hard sometimes though, when you dont’ have anything to immediately replace them. I think it’s all about acceptance and just having faith that things will work out.
I agree 100 percent with everything you wrote. We tend hurt more when we try to fix things that are so ridiculously unchangeable. As much as it bothers us–and we know that something cannot be controlled, we often try to control the situation more–which of course, results in more hurt–aggravation–and irritation. I have a hard time accepting things as they are–always wanting to look back and wish things could like they were, instead of just enjoying the moment and understanding that it is all I have right now–and that no matter what I am fortunate enough to have a here and now that has so many people in it that I enjoy having in it. It means we can’t let the little things bug us–like the face that keeps reappearing when we think they are gone for good, or the mistake that someone makes that caused us inconvenience. The things are unchangeable–but our attitudes are. Wonderful post.
Thank you, and wonderful comment! You encapsulated everything I was trying to get across – the more we fight, the more we struggle to change things we ultimately can’t, the more hurt and angered we become. Yet we do it to ourselves! Thanks for such an insightful thought 🙂
“Everything happens for a reason.”
I’ve always believed it and I will continue to believe in it. People come into our lives for a reason, and some are taken away (or leave) for a different reason. We can’t explain it, we just have to accept it and know that we gained something from that friendship/relationship. Whether it was a friend that helped you through a difficult time in your life, or someone who provided you with great memories and laughter — someone brings us something.
People can bring us something or they can teach us something – even if what they brought was packaged in pain and confusion, ultimately they’ll leave some sort of lesson which will better us for the future 🙂
“Who cares?” indeed.
I learned something from your blog today, my friend. 🙂
Aw, I’m glad. And I’m glad to see you back around the blogosphere!
I loved this post, Em. I wholeheartedly agree with pretty much all of what you said. The Universe does do funny things sometimes though.
You said, “I’m a firm believer that everything in life has its right time for happening”… and maybe you’re right. We do have to learn our lessons along the way.
I’d be curious though what your thoughts are on happenings that seem to have, IMHO, no purpose as all (like a chronic illness, life-threatening illness, etc.)… what are people supposed to learn from those?
1) How to deal with constant looks of pity from your friends, family, and co-workers.
2) How to appreciate the short time you spend on Earth before your inevitable expiration date.
3) How to support medical students trying to earn a living.
4) How to spell words like “palliative” and use them in everyday conversation.
(sorry san, I know you didn’t mean for your comment to be funny, but a serious response would probably be really depressing… so I jumped in)
5) How to break the world record for watching 6 seasons of LOST quicker than anyone on Earth.
(Yes, I could do this all day)
Firstly – Todd – too funny 😀
San – to address your question, it’s something I’ve wondered a LOT myself. Especially as someone with a chronic condition. I think the same outlook can be applied here as with Those People I was talking about. It’s easy to say “woe is me, how wronged and unfortunate I am”, but I think the real lesson is in strength and determination. Maybe the lesson is to learn how to choose positivity even in the face of adversity. After all, when it comes down to it, we all have our hardships in life. Some infinitely worse than others. But at the same time, we all have the choice as to how that’s going to affect the way we live our lives. Are we going to choose the easy route and become victims? Forever labelling ourselves as “a sufferer”? There’s a lot of research on chronic pain and chronic illness and its correlation to the mind – how perpetual negative thought patterns can latch onto the physical ailment and never heal. But honestly? I see a lot of blogs written by “sufferers” of this or that, and I think, really? That’s the legacy you want to leave in this world? I refuse to be known by what’s wrong with me. Plus it’d alienate everybody and I’d infinitely rather people’s genuine thoughts and opinions on things I’ve written or created, than their sympathies on a chronic condition I didn’t.
I’ve always been a believer of the ‘reason, season, lifetime’ approach to friendship. Meaning, people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or for a lifetime. There are people in my life that I thought for sure woudl be life time friends and now I see they were just part of a season of my life. As I get older, I get better at accepting that people change and grow and move apart. I still have fond memories of these friends and I wish them well. We just weren’t meant to be forever friends.
I like your spirit of acceptance with regards to those friends. “Reason, season, lifetime” is something I’ve not heard before, but I like it!
This is an absolutely fantastic post – and you are so right!
Thanks so much!! 🙂
Some awesome things to consider in our lives. Thanks for making me think on these lessons.
Thank you so much for stopping by 🙂
Admittedly, this is a really heavy idea to carry in one’s head on a Monday. 😛
I do think the fatalism in here is really useful, though. It might be a point of semantics, but perhaps “lessons” provide more opportunity for better living than simply accepting the “effects” of other people in our respective lives. In other words: “Keep an eye open.”
What I’m wondering about though, to further pursue the idea, is what about the people that come in and out of orbit that you don’t mind are there? The ‘aloof orbits,’ if we’re going to stick with the analogy. If not lessons, are they supposed to teach us anything?
It is a bit heavy, haha – my apologies. And appreciation for reading through it while I unload these thoughts and ideas 🙂
Extremely interesting point on the “aloof orbits” – I do love some food for thought! I think, if on one end of the spectrum, you have the people who keep surfacing that you DO mind, and their purpose is to teach some kind of lesson, and on the other end, there are the people that you couldn’t live without, and their purpose is to, I don’t know, reward you somehow for any number of things, then there has to be something in between, or life would be awfully empty. Or perhaps they’re all Sliding Doors Moments waiting to happen – anyone in the crowded sea of faces at a subway station could potentially fall to either end of the spectrum, depending on whether or not we see (and take) the tiniest of opportunities, or make the smallest different decision. I think all the in between people represent the world of possibilities out there – the inifinite number of paths life could have taken had we made one different turn. After all, the ones we mind and the ones we love can’t be all there is to life, can they?
You’re right. This was awfully heavy for a Monday night 🙂
I loved this post. Lately, I’ve been questioning who my “real” friends are and mourning the loss of friends I no longer see. Acceptance is a tough pill to swallow, but it helped me to read such great words coming from you.
Oh I’m so glad it helped a little. It is a really tough pill to swallow, but do keep in mind there’s a reason why people drift apart – and I’m sure the real ones who are meant to stay are just around the corner.
When I saw “gravitation” and “interpersonal relationships” juxtaposed, you had me at hello.
This science girl is giving you a big nod (oh yes). I love how you weave your experiences with the bigger picture. I agree, lovely.
Believe me, I’ve had my share of bad apples, and who knows, maybe there are some former lovers/partners who think back as me being a bad apple, too. But I do know this, we are both changed from the experience. Another notch in the lipstick case, per se.
I enjoyed this, Emily. Great to meet you and I’ll be seeing you ’round real soon.
Thanks so much for stopping by and for sharing your thoughts! W00t for another science girl – looking forward to reading lots more from you, I added you to my Reader today 🙂
Do you ever have people in your life who keep showing up, when you wish you could close the door on them and never have to see or hear about them again? <— Yes. My former best friend. Sometimes, I want to tell her (and my other friends) to just forget about me and let me go. Yes, I'm serious.
It's hard not to get annoyed or frustrated especially when you've been hurt. When everything comes back to you when you see them. But I agree. Not everything is under our control and I just have to accept the fact that we have common friends and I will still be seeing a lot of her. There are some things I can't control.
How awesome are you? I always learn something when I read your posts.
I think we have a lot of similar “former best friend” issues! It is hard not to get frustrated when you’ve been hurt. But people’s social circles do overlap and I’m REALLY trying to work on just accepting that instead of reacting to something I really have no control over! Thanks for the kind kind words as always 🙂
Great post ! Actually whenever things go wrong I generalyl say to myself ‘ who cares?’ but the reality is , I’m the only one who cares about whatever went wrong. You’ve correctly said that some people just come in our lives to teach us something . But not getting frustrated when you get hurt is not possible , what to do to make the person who hurted you realize that he’s wrong ?
Oh I think you can express hurt feelings at the time of being hurt, definitely. What I’m working on is trying to stop feeling so frustrated six months after the incidents when I see certain people around that I’d rather not – just accepting what’s happened, and leaving it in the past.
ooo, i like this lesson – to not react to situations just because they are there. I’m going to have to think on this one because surely I could learn from it =)
Wonderful blog, I love it. 🙂
WOW, have I ever had to learn this lesson…a few times. This statement says it perfectly “As long as you make the choice to live the life you want, make the right choices, be the best person you can be, grow from experiences, let go of the past, and focus on making the present the best you can, that’s all you can control.”
What more can I add to that?!
Thanks Emily, for writing such a thought provoking post.
Hi Keith! Thank you so much for stopping by and for reading, I really appreciate that! I am hopping over to your blog right away 🙂
Well said, Emily! I continually have to remind myself that I am not in control, that often times there are lessons to be learned when I’m given opportunities to interact with those around me, and especially those *I* may have chosen not to associate with for this reason or that. It’s usually when I open my mind that realization washes over me, and it becomes one of those “ah-ha” moments and everything becomes so clear.
You have such a gift for expressing yourself and I just had to tell you that I truly enjoy your thought-provoking posts…. Yes, I’m still reading, even though I haven’t commented very much lately. 😉
what a great post. i think that lesson of acceptance is DEFINITELY something that i need to learn.
Awesome post, Em! So true. If we didn’t go through ALL The lessons we’ve gone through in our lives (even the really hard ones) we wouldn’t be where we are today!!
1. It’s Amanda from It Starts with Us, and I’d just like to say the Dalek in the header is a nice touch. Also, sorry number 2 is really long.
2. This was beautiful and really inspirational and touching to me. I’ve come to this realization myself before with some people, that they just pass through to teach you something, to help you appreciate something more, and then they’re gone. They turn you completely on your head, and you wish you could spend more time with them, but they slip through your fingers.
But when I read this, it reminded me of a music teacher I had in grade 9 who I was really close to, even though I hadn’t known him long. He was like one of those friends you have who know you, and you feel like they know you, without them ever having to speak to you directly. It was his class that helped me become confident and participate in class because he encouraged me to, and expected me to. He left mid-semester for medical reasons, with my last memory of him being the doughnut he gave me on my birthday.
I took music the next year, and I was super excited to learn the saxophone because that had always been his instrument of choice. And I wanted so bad for him to come back and visit, just once, so that I could say “Look at me!!! I’m playing a sax just like you!!!” But more importantly, to say thank you, and to know if he would ever come back and be a part of my life again. He never came. We found out half way through that year on a Monday that he had died on the weekend.
I’m still in band, and I miss him all the time. He was an incredible person, and influential to a lot of people. I play two more instruments now, bari sax and piano a bit. But it wasn’t until I read this that I realized perhaps why he was gone from my life, that there was a purpose to it. Without his influence, being in band and playing an instrument wouldn’t be such an important part of my life, and I wouldn’t have had the confidence to try new things and pick up all sorts of new instruments. I also wouldn’t have had such an appreciation for music. Had he continued to be present in my life, I wouldn’t have noticed the impact he had made on me. I miss him dearly, and regret never being able to hear him play sax, because it would have been truly beautiful.
Thanks for reminding me of this. 🙂
I cannot “THIS!” this post enough, Em.
I have been trying and trying and trying to tape together the boxes that hold people I’d rather pretend never existed, people I wish forgot about me, people I wish would just let me get on with my life. And it refuses to shut. The tape peels off and out they come like a jack in the box. I don’t know what the lesson is, but I hope I’m learning- even if I haven’t realised as yet.
Thanks for this. x
Amazing Post! I could relate to your past experinces. I’m glad you’ve found happiness with your new love 🙂
Who cares? is so, so true. And something I could certainly benefit from putting into practice more frequently.
Very well-said, Emily. This post hit home with me in so many ways. I have tried to become more accepting and patient with the way my life is and the way it isn’t. Though sometimes I do better at it than others. 😉
I’ve been thinking a lot about people and how they come in and out of our lives lately. About how coincidences and how things always happen the way they’re supposed to, even if it seems like one different move would have made things totally different.
I’ve also been thinking a lot about people coming in and out of my life who I wish would just go away, and you’re right on the money – we’re supposed to accept it. Get over it. Move on. It’s so true – who cares?
It is a pleasure to read your blog since we share similar views about the world and life. I guess that is probably why I am here reading this post. I can’t escape the gravitational pull of your thoughts haha!
Like you I also firmly believe in timing. But it can be a hard concept to apply especially when our emotions get the better of us in the heat of the moment. How often have great battles in history gone awry simply because the commanders could not get the timing right? The Ancient Chinese believed strongly in timing and trying to align their actions with the Tao to get favourable results.
Yeah, I always thought that if I didn’t learn the lessons that life wanted me to learn, I would have to repeat the class until I got it right. I’m so happy to read that you have learned your lessons well and your reward is the upcoming marriage you have. I’m sure that it’ll be a beautiful one. 🙂
Ah acceptance. One of the hardest lessons in life that I struggled with. But once I mastered the lesson, it helped me to deal with the challenges I faced more effectively. In truth, the only control we have in this world is the control over ourselves. When we fail to accept a situation, we expend energy trying to struggle against it. In the end, resistance is futile and a waste of effort. If you can accept it and be like water, you will be able to handle any problem you face.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful post!
I loved this post. Especially the last part about having people in our lives still, that we might not want around anymore. It’s so true of me at this moment in time. And your way to handle it sounds much better, because honestly? I’m wearing myself out worrying and stressing about the situation and particularly the person.
Wonderful, wonderful post. You know, you’re rapidly becoming a favourite destination online for me.
On about the whole gravitation thing, I’ve often thought of myself along the same lines – some kind of wandering planet, passing across the path of everybody else, moving into and out of people’s lives along the way…
Oh Universe indeed. I came across this blog post at the perfect time! Dealing with some things that I can’t seem to shake off..err.. people that I can’t seem to shake off and your “who cares” struck home nicely! Exactly what I needed so… I thank you! xoxoxoxo.