That time I got BANNED…

Earlier this week, I visited an online community I’d been a member of ever since I got engaged, but had rarely checked or used. I’d just finished making our uber-nerdy table cards for the wedding, and after getting great reactions from a couple of friends, I was totally excited to share them with other brides-to-be!  I posted two pictures and a little blurb on all the geeky details we were going to be having in the wedding, which were going down quite well, and I was loving reading about everyone else’s sci-fi touches (bride and groom lightsaber duel? Yes please!), when I got a message.

Put your second image behind a cut.

Now I’m about as competent in HTML as I am in Cantonese, and in the two minutes before leaving for work that morning after I got the message, I tried pressing the “LJ-cut” button on the picture… and it didn’t work.  I figured the moderator would either do it for me, or I’d have another go when I got home at the end of the day. Either way, I didn’t have time to figure it out then and there.  About an hour after I got to work, I received a series of INSANE messages from the community moderator. Number one:

I’m deleting your post now, since you’ve obviously seen my comment, and have yet to put your second picture behind a cut. Shame, since there are lots of great comments in here.

To which I responded that it seemed a little harsh and rather unwelcoming, that I hadn’t had time to figure out how to do that, and asked if she could put it back and show me how, or simply do it for me.  Cue immediate response (and I quote):

Unwelcoming?! Instead of being an adult, you decided to throw a temper tantrum because I made you follow the rules. You are NOT above the rules. They apply to you just like they apply to everyone else. I don’t think you should take your frustrations out on me – you were the one at fault here. And no, I can’t put your post back up. Deleted means gone. Forever. I almost wanted to leave it up so you could get your ass handed to you by everyone else (seriously, they don’t have any patience for rule-breakers, either), but decided the drama wasn’t worth it so I deleted it. We enforce the rules for everyone, and don’t make exceptions for special snowflakes. Seriously, so much fail.  Also, you’re banned.

At which point I burst out laughing in total and utter disbelief. Note to self:


  1. That’s ridiculous. And harsh. And completely unwarranted.
    El Jay can be a bit of a power trip for some people.

    The Internet makes people bigger twats than they are in reality. I hope.

    Shake it off and step up.

  2. I had opened your post in one of my tabs to read, and when I went back to reply it was gone!

    The mods there are NUTS. I don’t understand why people freak out about pictures.

    You’re better then them ❤

  3. Oh my goodness Em, SO MUCH FAIL. I about died with laughter when I read that. Was the moderator like, twelve? Some people have jobs and lives outside of the internet and can’t fix things IMMEDIATELY.. unlike that moderator, I assume.

  4. But what if you’d been away or your internet was broken or something that equally meant that you couldn’t get back to amend your post – thats just ridiculous! When I first saw your tweet (?) yesterday about it I was like “huh? whats a cut?” and I know bits and pieces of HTML.

  5. Oh my god Em. I hope you’re not upset about being “Banned”, because this childish gnat sounds about as mature as a three year old un-inviting you to their birthday. If anything, this is just comedic gold. And also – I will now use the term special snowflake ad naseum.

  6. LOL i don’t even have any words. just goes to show how ridiculous people can be when they’re tucked away behind their computer screens. it’s livejournal, not the magna carta lol. too funny

  7. Wow. I’m aghast, I’m agog. Seriously. The things I’ve posted to communities and chats after a few drinks and I’ve NEVER been banned from anywhere.

  8. Oh good grief there are some power-tripping little trolls out there in Net-land neh?

    When will people learn that authority doesn’t mean you have the right to become a complete moron? Seriously, after a few years as a moderator, I would have a few choice things to say to this little oik. May I please hand this guy’s ass (which he seems to be so far up that he’d roll if pushed) to him on a silver platter? Pleeeeeeeeaaase?

    What a child. Yet it’s not the first time I’ve encountered behaviour like this, and it sucks to hear that snot-nosed little rats still exist.

  9. Seriously??

    I like how you asked for help, and they’re like “Naw, we’re gonna send a nasty message instead”

    Go on – they’re WAY welcoming there and will be just as excited, IF NOT MORE about your nerdy touches. Plus, they LOOOOOOVE pictures.

  10. That is hilarious.
    I think that person gets too excited about enforcing internet rules.
    I hope they’re nicer to the person they’re marrying (or married to)!

    More importantly, though…. congrats on your uber-nerdy table cards!! You are definitely one special snowflake. 🙂

  11. And your name shall henceforth be known as “One Special Snowflake”…, what an ASS that ASShole was to you! Sigh, people are so ridiculous. I would have been pretty angry. It’s good you laughed it off though.

  12. man… she’s pretty uptight for a wedding community moderator!

    whatever, you did the right thing and if she didn’t have the patience or decency to show you HOW to make the cut, then she’s the idiot.

    also, i hadn’t seen the table cards until now and obviously i think they’re FANTASTIC! you’re so creative and i can’t wait to see ALL the details in the wedding pictures! i’m seriously jealous of your nerd-nuptials.


    – e

  13. Clearly someone’s power hungry and convinced their job is worth a lot more importance in the grand scheme of things. I mean, if you never checked it much before, it’s no big loss, right? Better off not dealing with people who flip out about the small stuff.

  14. Oh, wow! I love how people assume that things on the internet can be fixed immediately. Some of us have jobs outside of the internet and can’t monitor everything 100% of the time.

  15. Ok, I am going to be honest… I don’t even know what this “moderator” (and I have to put that in quotation marks, because she’s obviously not very mature and shouldn’t be a moderator of a big forum) meant with “put your second image behind a cut”.

    This is ridiculous, seriously. But unfortunately, I’ve seen a lot of ‘drama’ like this in forums… some people become moderators so they can boss people around more or less anonymously.

  16. Bahahaha!! I can’t believe they made such a big deal about something so insignificant. Those community mods can get pretty psycho. I remember the same sort of attitudes from my LJ days. Special snowflake 😀

  17. I’m glad you have a good attitude towards all of this! She obviously is not happy about her life to get so crazy about you taking a little time to figure out what she’s even talking about. I wouldn’t have a clue. Just brush it off! (It does make a good story!)

  18. It seems someone who has high sensitivity to estrogen had a visit from aunt Flow. Glad yer not worrying about this “person”, M. Let the little nazi have its power trip.

  19. Sooo…what we learned about this moderator is that she has no patience, is great at over-reacting and has serious personal issues with snowflakes.

    We should all get together, form a snowball and hurl ourselves in her general direction.

  20. What?!!! That’s crazy. SHE’S crazy! So, wait, let me get this straight. Who’s the adult throwing a temper tantrum? Yeah, that’s what I thought…

    And personally, being a special snowflake sounds pretty awesome. Better than being her, that’s for sure!

  21. It’s funny for me because this is by far not even the worst infraction I’ve seen in forum-moderation-land. How do they expect to build a community if they refuse to help newbies?

    It’s totally a power trip. Possibly combined with catching her on a bad day.

  22. Don’t worry about them. LJ is full of uptight adults who never want to grow up and think that because they hide behind a computer screen, they think they’re the second coming of Hitler.

    I’ve been banned from a group before and it was quite hilarious. YOUR BANNED! Hahaha, I burst out laughing at that line in their response. Oh ElJay… you funny. Please don’t take that the wrong way. I just find some LJ posters/moderators most hilarious when they act that way.

    And an FYI… Easy LJ cut: picture code or text

  23. That’s so ridiculous. Talk about taking the internet WAY too seriously. I love how, in one instance she said it was a pity she had to delete the post because there were good comments, but then said they were going to tear you to pieces for not following rules. If it was really such an infraction, you would think the community would automatically jump down your throat about it.

    Glad to see you took it lightly, though it seems pretty hard to take it seriously.

  24. Uhm, I hand code XHTML and have zero idea what “behind a cut” means, lol.

    Plus what happened to a window of time to follow through with that? Not everyone sits in a forum immediately replying to things. Some people post in a forum and then GO TO A JOB and don’t even notice things until later. If I were you, I’d just call out the site so no one else bothers dealing with them LOL

  25. Oh, I definitely feel you! My old blogging days were over at LiveJournal and they’re SO obsessed with putting everything behind a LJ-cut. Wish I was able to help you do that before the crazy moderator deleted your post.

  26. Wow. Just wow. First of all, I have NO IDEA what “put your second image behind the cut” means but what’s up with the power trip? I mean, MOST people have lives and jobs to go to. If it was me, there are days I wouldn’t be able to get to it until after 6pm!

    I’m glad you can laugh about it, though, because it IS pretty funny. 🙂

  27. I know a bit about HTML, but I have NO idea what that means, either. That’s not even reasonable to expect you to do it so quickly… and not help you when you ask for it! Sounds like a girl who’s miserable in her real life so the only joy she has is bossing around others on the Internet! I’m sure you can find a more welcoming wedding community that will be happy to hear what you have to share!

  28. My best guess is he/she is an ugmo who needs to get laid and is jealous of your hotness. I can’t think of any other reason. What a dickface, pardon my French.

  29. LOL. I’ve heard a lot of crazy stories like that. I’m not sure what these people even get out of being so rude. Like, I would consider it a pain to have to write you that long paragraph about how big of a fail you are, Snowflake.

  30. Oh Emily! I’m so sorry you went through this bullsh*t. I’m just going to assume moderator is jealous of how many wonderful comments you had on your post, and that’s why she had to go and delete it. You’re wonderful, and the people love you! xoxo

  31. They can fix these things for you, and a sensible person would do it with a reminder that you should be using the cut. Forum moderation seems to attract the worst kind of people, or they just get that way after a while. But these sites tend to be full of all kinds of arseholes anyway, yes, even arseholes get married, lol. Always keep in mind that your blog followers are a real community of people who are on your side.

  32. Wow. Someone’s on a serious powertrip, huh? *insert rolling eyes here* I’m glad you shrugged it off and saw the humor in it. You’re awesome and don’t let this person try to tell you any diff. 😉

  33. Holy eff. That moderator’s been drinking the “I’m the queen” sauce with every meal. What the hell is wrong w/people?? It’s a freaking picture. UGH!! What an asshole.
    So sorry you had to spend time on the moron train.


  34. Haha, ElJay is so full of drama. How ridiculous to ban you for something like that. I must admit all those rules that communities put up make me roll my eyes. I’m not really active in a lot of LJ communities though.

  35. > I think that’s a little harsh. Please could you put the post back – I tried putting the pic
    > behind a cut in the couple of minutes I had to check the computer before work this
    > morning – I’m not that familiar with LJ and couldn’t get it to work – I think deleting it
    > completely without giving me a chance to fix it is a little harsh. If you could please put
    > it back and show me how I can do an LJ cut, or simply wait until I’m home from work
    > and have time to figure it out myself, I’d really appreciate it. This message was very…
    > unwelcoming and doesn’t make your community look very nice.
    > Emily

  36. I used to be a moderator on an online community (not LJ) and the amount of Mods with power trips was just ridiculous! There’s a good chance that your crazy Mod in their real life isn’t very important, so they get their kicks from being “in charge” online. Sad.

  37. Em,

    I think it is a matter of principle…
    you need to bring this to the attention of this person’s superior!

    No one who represents an organization or entity should be allowed to be so caustic to one of its members/customers (EVEN IF they feel they have just cause). People who do not understand this do not understand successful business modeling.

    Go get ’em Em!
    ~D. Knoble

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