Unmasked

Hannah Katy wrote an incredible post last week,  and it inspired me to write about something that’s been a bit of a regular in my life in the last few years.  First and foremost, I’m going to admit something: I despise fakeness. I also despise unnecessary negativity.  And recently, I’ve learned the unfortunate truth that the world, and the Internet, is full of it. But I’ve also learned that, as with so many things in life – you have a choice in how you let it affect you.

Growing up, I spent far too many pretending to be someone I’m not. I think what it came down to was the result of one too many bad relationships, leaving me with a pretty low sense of self-worth and confidence – and I desperately wanted to be seen as popular, to have people to “reaffirm” that I was worth something – at the expense of staying true to myself.

Image from Zemotion

Once I turned eighteen, as I think so many people do, I felt I needed somehow needed to define myself. Define myself with a career goal, with a group of friends, with independence and opinions… with an identity.  Several years went by, and I darted from job to job, boyfriend to boyfriend, friends to friends, in an ongoing endeavour to find myself. Find where I belonged.  Make myself into somebody that fit, in the secret hope that one day I would. You all know I had some rough relationship experiences, and I strongly believe were it not for those hard times, I would have remained the person I was five years ago. What motivation would I have had to change? After the last breakup, I decided this was the time to set standards for myself. To not just settle for anyone.  To be okay by myself and stay true to who I am, even if that meant being alone.  I learned a lot about myself by doing that, and it’s something that’s been an ongoing challenge. Not just in relationships (for the past two years I’ve been blessed with someone who’s believed in me, challenged me, and helped me push myself out of my comfort zone, seeing and believing in my potential) – but in friendships, too.

I don’t know how many of you subscribe to the notion of personality types, but it’s something I’ve always found intriguing, particularly in the Myers-Briggs ideas.  I think it’s fascinating how accurate the descriptions are, not just in terms of personal tendencies, but in how we react to any given situation, whether socially, at work, with other people, or in the face of adversity.  I am an INFJ (the “Protector”) through and through:

INFJs have an exceptionally strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others, and find great personal fulfillment interacting with people, nurturing their personal development, guiding them to realise their human potential. Although they are happy working at jobs (such as writing) that require solitude and close attention, they do quite well with individuals or groups of people, provided that the personal interactions are not superficial, and that they find some quiet, private time every now and then to recharge their batteries. Not usually visible leaders, INFJs prefer to work intensely with those close to them, especially on a one-to-one basis, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes.

INFJs tend to be devoted to what they believe in and seek work where their needs, values, and ideals can be deeply engaged. INFJs, while concentrating on what is important to them, may ignore the political ramifications of their actions. Being able to talk honestly and comfortably to people at work is much more important to them than ‘playing games.’

The INFJ’s external environment may appear disorganized. Their internal environment, by contrast, is anything but haphazard. Organization of the internal world takes precedence over organization of the external world.

INFJs prefer occupations that focus on the big picture, involve conceptual awareness, and lead to a better understanding of the needs of people. They want their work to have impact and meaning. INFJs value staff harmony and want an organization to run smoothly and pleasantly, themselves making every effort to contribute to that end. They are crushed by too much criticism and can have their feelings hurt rather easily. They respond to praise and use approval as a means of motivating others, just as they, the INFJs, are motivated by approval.

Motivated by approval. Growing up, I had a desperate need to be affirmed in everything I did.  Doing things like acting, sports, talent shows, writing stories – being told I was good at something made me feel amazing. Later in life, I was a devout student:  I loved my assignments and I loved getting tests back. Being good at school gave me a sense of self-worth, and only in recent years have I realised why I so easily gave up who I was: to fit in. I needed the approval of others. Fastforward to summer of 2009 when I was crippled with anxiety, too scared to even eat lunch with coworkers for fear of what people may have thought of me. I wasn’t comfortable with who I was because I didn’t know who I was, and so it led me into a shell. Thankfully through determination, perseverance, faith, friends, and Sweet’s encouragement, I’m now at a point where I know who I am. And I know who and what I need (and can do without) in my life.

I am dedicated to making a positive impact in the world. I sincerely want to do all I can to help other people, whether  through my workplace, my personal life, or my blog. One of the many reasons I write is not only to document my life, but to write about the struggles, the bad stuff as well as the good, and overcoming it, in the hope that it might reach someone – and maybe even inspire them. The emails I get on the subject may be few in number, but mean the absolute world to me. Knowing I’ve inspired just one or two people means more than any number of comments ever could. I don’t write to be popular, and I don’t let online time interfere with real life. I’m easily hurt, but I refuse to maintain vendettas or seek revenge. I believe being able to live a good life while maintaining integrity is better than revenge of any sort.  I value interpersonal harmony and am deeply unsettled by conflict, yet I am passionate about my values and beliefs, and blatantly honest. I will always tell you how it is, even if it’s not what you want to hear. But it’s only because I believe in the power of truth.  This has resulted in people cutting ties with me and even getting fired from a job, but I will not keep quiet if there is something important to be said. I will speak up if I believe it’s for the greater good. I will not be taken down by those who continue to define me by my past mistakes – I will focus on continuing to better myself; the person I am becoming because of them. I will not let fear dictate my life. I will question the truth in rumours rather than continue them.  I will not follow the masses and ignore an elephant in a room, but will put a hat on it and maybe even hop on and take it for a ride. People may find that uncomfortable and distance themselves, but I will always stay true to myself. Because that, to me, is more important than popularity. I will write about the good as well as the bad, and refuse to create an online persona – even if that decreases readership. I may not be popular, but I am real. And you know what? I’m 100% okay with that.

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69 comments

  1. I am in love with this post. Absolutely in love. I don’t even know what to comment on first.

    I love that you’re so honest about the good and the bad. Often people only talk about the good and sweep the bad under the rug and I don’t know why that happens. Life is both good and bad and I read blogs to experience it all.

    I think you’re wonderful, and I think it’s great that you stay true to yourself in all aspects of life.

  2. Beautiful.

    If this was the post you thought you may lose readers over, I hope that’s not the case because I loved this post. So real and raw.

    I haven’t known you for long, but you’ve become a beautiful person. I consider myself to be very fortunate to have gotten to know you as much as I have.

  3. Well said! I am so happy to have inspired this post by you love, it was beautifully written and it really resonated a lot of with my own self… Especially your description from the Myers Briggs test… Makes me want to go back and take it again, that description seemed spot on for me… But I am right with you, I am also refusing to live up to some online persona, at the end of the day it is not about popularity it is about writing what I love and what I feel and having people take it for what it is… Thanks for putting this out there! You could not have said it better Em!

    Best,

    Hannah Katy

    1. I take the Myers Briggs every so often, just to see if it ever changes… but I always end up with the same result, and I think it’s very accurate 🙂 I’m reading a book right now on all the different personality types – I find learning about how other people work just fascinating. Thank YOU for the inspiration 🙂

  4. Wow. I love this. I check your blog at least once a day and every single post just blows my mind. I am an ENFP, so a little different but yet I still believe in honesty regardless of how it will make people feel. I was just like you though that I cared too much what people thought for way too long in my life. Although I have gotten better with it, I sometimes still let what other people say and do influence me too much. Reading your blog everyday helps me to remember that I only need to believe what I feel about MYSELF. Not what OTHERS think or feel about me.

    Thank you for the raw and heartfelt post- if you lose readers because of this than they shouldn’t have been your readers in the first place. You are too good of a person for people to judge you or dislike your honesty.

    I love these types of post and can’t wait to see even more like it. And if you want to inspire people- you have never once ceased to inspire me.

    Love it- and you! 🙂
    Ashley

    1. Thank you so much for such a kind comment! ❤ I'm going to look up ENFP – I love reading up on how other people work and I find the Myers Briggs so very accurate in so many aspects… what you said about reading my little blog seriously meant the world to me today, and I am so happy it can do some good 🙂 So happy I found you and your blog too!! xx

  5. brilliant post em. i’m so proud you didn’t let what happened with kyla & them bring you down. some people just can’t take honesty preferring to live a pretend life of fairytales but if you can’t be yourself around someone then those people aren’t worth having around anyway. have you heard that new broken bells record, ‘the high road is hard to find’, reminds me of you when i hear it. you’re inspiring and i hope you take what ppl here are saying to heart. the world needs more people like you.

    1. Thank you so much love ❤ I'm slowly learning the value of priorities – so often before, I had mine wrong, I put honesty and staying true to myself way down on the list, under popularity and fitting in. I suppose we all go through that to some extent as we grow up. It's taking some tough times and experiences but I'm determined to stay on the path of integrity and honesty, even if that does cost me those things I held so important only a few years ago. I'm learning to believe in myself and not let people bring me down – because there will always be people who try. Reminds me of a quote from Glee actually lol, something Sue Sylvester said about people either cheering you on or an angry mob tearing you down – they're both just making a lot of noise, but it's how you take it that's the key. 🙂 And yes! I love that song!! 🙂

  6. Amen.

    I couldn’t agree with you more about everything you said in your post – especially the last part of it. Being real, authentic and true to oneself are the most important things I look for in people.

  7. This is an amazing post, Emily! I LOVE that you are so honest. I know I went through a time like you did…a time when I didn’t know myself, a time when I faked it, a time when I tried to be so many different “me’s” depending on who I was around just because I wanted to by liked and loved by everyone. I was scared, anxious, easily intimidated. When faced with filling out an “Interests” portion on something like a Myspace profile, I would stare at the blinkin cursor and just dread every moment of filling that portion out, because I didn’t KNOW what my interests were. I only knew what other people expected them to be, because I was trying to fit myself into a mold of other people’s expectations. The past couple years I’ve really come to know myself so much more. I don’t know if that’s just typical for this age or what, but something clicked and I’ve just been growing and learning and changing so much. “Changing” might not be the right word…more like finally NOT changing? Or coming into my TRUE self, for the first time. Learning to be confident. Learning to tell the truth about me. Learning to not be so afraid of confrontation. And most importantly, learning to say to HELL with what other people think!! 😀

    1. Oh goodness, I remember the very same thing! Sitting in front of a blank Myspace profile wondering what on earth to write in the “About Me” and “Interests” section… I wonder if it’s something about hitting our mid twenties, or if it’s life experience, or both – but I relate to everything you said SO much!! I’m so glad you’re finding the same thing – all we can really focus on is what we do as people, not what other people are going to think or say about us, and trusting who we are more as people. I’m so glad you’re coming into yourself 🙂

  8. Love this times infinity! This almost reads like a mission statement and I think it’s so important for people to have one. It keeps you grounded and focused, and even if you’re not “popular,” you are true and honest and doing what God put you here to do. Seriously, what more does a person need?

    1. Oh thanks so much lady!! It really is kind of a mission statement that’s always evolving. And honestly – I think it’s come about ever since I found my faith in the last couple of years. Things that used to bother me so much are just insignificant when you know you are doing what you are supposed to be doing 🙂

  9. Good post. Where does one find out what personality type they are? I’ve been in a state of drift lately and would like to find some footing. Thanks for the read.

    1. Thanks for reading Les 🙂 The “official” Myers Briggs test online I think you have to pay for at their website (http://www.capt.org/take-mbti-assessment/mbti.htm), but there are a few out there you can take that give you an idea of what type you would be:

      http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

      http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/mmdi/questionnaire/

      http://www.keirsey.com/sorter/instruments2.aspx?partid=0

      Those seem like they would give a good idea – there are also books on it that are really interesting. This book is really good.

  10. I think it’s very easy to just post the happy stuff – it takes so much more effort to talk about the real, raw, gritty stuff. Good for you for staying true to yourself, lady.

  11. We’re ok with it too 🙂

    Nice post. I want to take that test and see where I fall in. I’m guessing I’ll fall into the same category as you. haha. Cause the description sounds a lot like me. I also LOATHE fakeness!!! Just be real, people!

    Glad you have come gracefully into accepting yourself.

  12. this post seriously MADE ME CRY!
    I am living and breathing the same exact fears, insecurities, doubts, etc that you talk about in this post.

    I recently did something at work…that is not something I would normally do, but felt it was the “right” thing to do. I am struggling SOOOO much with trying to figure out for myself if I really should have done it, if maybe I rubbed my boss the wrong way, if maybe now everyone hates me, if maybe because I said what I did…the world will explode?? Ok..joking, but you get the picture!
    My extreme anxiety over how I’m “percieved” is too great! I have overcome so much in my personal life…but when it comes to my work life, I’m a terrible mess!

    I would love to hear how you overcame things…how you came to this point where you are now. You are so inspiring.

    Thank you for not being fake!

  13. Hey Emily! FANTASTIC post. What I love about you is that you’re such an open, honest, and genuine woman. When you share so openly, you set an example for everyone else, and “open the door” for all of us to share ourselves so openly as well. You are bold and you are a leader. I’m sorry if your blog addresses this somewhere else, but I’m new to following you, so I’m curious – with all your interest in different personalities are you headed towards some type of psychology related career?

    1. Thank you so much Jessie!! I’d hardly call myself a “leader”, but maybe one day… I’m still on the road to getting there 🙂 I studied psychology for a couple of years in university, but I was always discouraged from pursuing it “because nobody ever does anything with psych degrees”! I still read the books and buy the magazines, but for now I’m just a keen learner and observer 🙂

  14. It’s scary how much I can relate to this. (The anxiety part) You have inspired me in so many ways and there are so many ways I identify with this post. Like you, I’m not blogging to be popular. I don’t blog about safe topics. I blog about what I’m feeling and sometimes, it’s not exactly PC. But I like how honest I am and I like that other people respect that. I may get more comments on posts I feel are more mundane and boring, than the ones that speak deeply from my heart, but I don’t care.

    I feel so lucky to call you a friend, Emily!

  15. I shared this post with all my coworkers today. Brilliantly written as always, and the message is so true. You’ve come so insanely far in the last year I barely even recognize you – in the best way possible. It sucks so hard there’ll always be people who will try and sabotage your attempts at growth but it is only because they themselves are not as strong as you. Same with the people who drop you because of your honesty. I can’t believe you got fired for speaking up (must have been a $hitty place to be though!!! glad you’re out of there!) and unfortunately you’re right, the internet is full of fakeness and often it seems like the fake people are the most successfull. Which makes it all the more awesome you stay true to yourself. Your determination to grow and spread positivity in the world is nothing short of breathtaking and the world REALLY needs more people like you and less people like the ones who cut you out of their lives. I think I speak for everyone when I say we are more than okay with you being real. Its refreshing, admirable and great to see someone take such control over their life no matter what happens.

    1. Hey Lisa, you’re far too sweet! Thank you for your words and for your support – it REALLY means such a lot. It was just a chemist’s I got fired from, nothing major, haha 🙂

  16. “I may not be popular, but I am REAL.”

    I think I’ve been saying that for a while . . . it’s the only reason I invited you to write for ItStartsWith.Us. I’m glad you A) realize that and B) embrace it. Good show.

    1. Thank you sir 🙂 It’s only been in recent months (and I think thanks in huge part to you) that I’ve taken “what most people like to read about” off my priority list and shoved “things that actually matter” right to the top. Fortunately that’s a wide umbrella and can also include things like Daleks lol 🙂

  17. Well I think the world of you, my dear. It’s been really helpful to read your posts. As you know, I’ve had some struggles this year and it was so helpful to have you to email about – and just knowing you had been through something similar and come through it stronger!

    I definitely spent the early years of my 20s finding myself. It’s taken until the last couple of years to really feel like I know who I am. I just returned to my former employer this week & one of my ex-boyfriends works in the dept I got hired into. I was kind of wondering how it would be to see him – we dated 4 years ago & haven’t spoken in 3 years. On Monday morning, I walked into his office and was my friendly, confident self. We had a really great conversation and I think we can really be friends. The person I was 3 years ago could not have walked in there and talked to him. And now we are probably going to have a friendship as a result. I mean, we obviously are not going to be best friends, but we can have a friendly working relationship. I was just so insecure and kind of ‘broken’ when we last spoke – it was good to see how much we have both changed since then.

    1. Awww, sweetie – I’ve loved chatting with you over the last little bit and I’m so glad if I helped in any way at all. I’m so happy you’re in this place with security, and what must be relief, too 🙂

  18. great post! i find personality tests/horoscope things really apply to me too. we are similar, but i’m an enfj and it really does describe me and the enfj is known as the teacher, which is what i am!

    i did watch glee last night and LOVED it. can’t wait for next week’s madonna episode! yay!!!

  19. Oh very close! I love the tests that tell you how MUCH of an “I” or an “E” you are – I took one (I wish I could remember which site) and it said I was only “slightly” introverted which makes sense in that I find being in front of people and surrounded by people slightly more scary than not, yet when I’m by myself I’m comfortable, but often find I crave company, too… it sounds like you’re in the perfect role 🙂

    I JUST saw the “Vogue” video tonight (our PVR didn’t catch it)… too funny!!! I had “Hello Goodbye” in my head all day today too 🙂

  20. This is exactly why I voted for you(20sb Featured..) eventhough honestly I only read two or three (?) of your posts. You write in a so true-to-yourself way. And ‘know what, I’m learning from you.

    Who cares if only one or two stop by your blog your entire blogging life? (I do!) But yes, you are right, if this would compromise you having to not being yourself that would be like you have not blogged at all. Because it isn’t you after all, it’s somebody else.

    1. Thank you SO much!! Honestly I’ve never been nominated before and I don’t think I’ll ever be a super-blogger like a lot of the people that are – but your vote and your kind words seriously mean the world!! I’m so glad you stopped by – even if only a handful of people read, if people see what I write and take something away from it that’ll better their life, then that means more than any number of subscriptions ever could 🙂 Thank you thank you!

  21. I really enjoy reading your blogs Em, your a really good writer and write about things that really matter. Keep it up!

  22. Yay for INFJs! The last paragraph especially describes me very well. I’ve become so much more focused on my interests and motivated by internal desires instead of external validation, and I’m so much happier for it!

    1. That makes me so happy to hear – life is so much more fulfilling when you realise what energises you and what’s worth your thoughts and efforts – and when you learn about yourself, your personality, and focus on being motivated by the things that matter, life can be so much more fulfilling and liberating 🙂

  23. I love this post. I love that you are real, it is why I follow your blog. I am the same way, I can’t stand fakeness.

    I, too, have struggles with my identity and wanting approval from others. In the last year I feel like I have really broken away from that and it has been amazing.

    Personality typing systems are fascinating to me. I use the Enneagram (much like Meyers-Briggs, it’s based on psychological and spiritual concepts). I am a type 8 and it fits me to a tea. It was so cool to read about it because I was like, “Omigosh, that’s me.” How cool that we have these tools to work with.

    Your blog inspires me every time I read. I love that you are encouraging people to be themselves and share the good and the bad. I love that you are sharing your journey. That is why I read your blog!

    1. Holly – I am so glad I found you and your blog. It seems like we both started breaking away from what was holding us back at about the same time – it’s a wonderful feeling but an ongoing journey 🙂

      I would love to take the Enneagram – I’ve never heard of it! I’m going to look into it this evening 🙂 Thank you so so much for your kind comments!!

  24. I’m 100% ok with that too! 🙂 Otherwise we wouldn’t be so close. I love your look on life, and im inspired by your love of everything and willing to speak your mind about the things you don’t like so much. Your real, true, and thats why I love you so much. If you were anything else, or try to be anything else, it just wouldn’t be the same. You know you always have me as a friend, and confident. 🙂 Love you Em!!

  25. I love how real you are, Emily. This was such a fabulous post, for so many reasons.

    First of all, I love when you said: “After the last breakup, I decided this was the time to set standards for myself. To not just settle for anyone. To be okay by myself and stay true to who I am…” I’ve never talked about my relationship past much on my blog, but my husband and I dated for six and a half years before marrying, and at one point, a few years into the relationship, it wasn’t so good. I felt exactly how you did, and we took some time apart. In that time, I realized who I was and that I would be OKAY by myself, and it made all the difference in the world. It changed how I viewed myself, how I viewed our relationship, and it greatly changed his view of me. All for the better, thankfully.

    You’ve been very inspirational to me, especially now in regard to the anxiety issue. I feel like I’m where you were a year ago, and I want to make progress just as you have. 🙂

    1. Oh sweetie – thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing – knowing you can be okay by yourself is so empowering – actually, Sweet is often away on work trips etc. and I’d dated people in the past who often had to go away too – I used to be TERRIFIED at home, by myself, worrying about what they were doing, if I was being forgotten, what everyone else was doing while I was by myself… and it was just ridiculous! Now I can come home and give myself a face mask… cuddle with the cat… crank up the Glee soundtrack and not worry about anyone hearing me… lol things are very different. I’m so glad it’s made all the world of difference for you guys 🙂 I hope we can keep talking and sharing and moving forward – it sounds like you’re way ahead of where you might think you are 🙂

  26. TRULY AWE-INSPIRING. as in it’s awesomely inspiring. or awe as in the sound one makes after breathing a breath of fresh air or seen a child tie there shoes or ride a bicycle for the first time. and simply beautiful. i felt like no real words have yet been created to describe your post so i thought maybe best to create one and a definition for it. you truly have a gift for the linguistics. a way of capturing your readers and allowing them to see your perspective on the world around you. i just stumbled upon your post simply by searching for words of inspriration. i’m more than happy and glad to have come across and discovered it.

    it rings a truth that speaks volumes and is truly eye-opening. with all the ‘fake’ out there one begins to lose focus and lose track of themselves and needs a way to come to grips with reality. but instead seems to be lead down a path where you only think that all the world is a stage and we are but the actors on it. performing for each other. posts like yours allows other to come to grips with the idea that one shouldn’t have to “perform” all the time or at all but instead decide just who it is we really are and whether or not the people around you are being REAL or FAKE with you.

    if by any means you thought this would stir any followers to stay clear of you from now on, my hope is it’s just the opposite and instead find new followers and fans. because as far as i’m concerned you’ve made a believer out of me.

  27. I love this post, Em, and I’m so glad you aren’t willing to compromise who you are for the sake of popularity.

    I am an INFJ too. From what I’ve read it’s supposed to be the rarest type. I have a sneaking suspicion the number of INFJ who are bloggers is proportionally higher than other types. It’s just a theory I have. 🙂

  28. Beautiful and inspirational post. And a great introduction to your blog, since it gives me such an insight into who you are! I think all bloggers should be 100% themselves.

  29. I am happy you have figured yourself out, I always said you were more true to yourself in doing things like this, like blogging, toting Dr Who (the new Who has been SO good don’t even get me started about how amped I am for the next episode), or just general crafty, arty, geeky stuff. I am definitely happy you’ve found someone who has given you the support you needed – single guys are by nature dumb, often causing more drama then they are worth (I say this from mucho experience-o), it can really make for a crazy life. Relationships are where it’s at! Stay focused, stay true to yourself. All the best.

  30. Great post, and one that I can easily identify with. 🙂

    It’s funny, when I was younger I expected that the concept of “popularity” would vanish post-high school, or at least take on a more reasonable form.. People would be popular for their ideas, accomplishments, etc.

    Then I found out I was sorely mistaken. Not only do people still care about “who knows who” and “who has money”, but everyone still seems to adhere to the same views on what is socially acceptable (and sexy/cool/whatever). As someone who, like you, is able to constantly & convincingly reinvent herself, I’ve found that I CAN fit in anywhere… but do I want to?

  31. i do believe that we would be best of friends in real life. your type of personality is exactly the kind i need in my life. i also THRIVE on attention and being told i’m good at something. i am working on being ok with being alone. i have blogged about it a few times because i feel it helps with my fear by talking about them. i love your openess. i’m so glad i found your blog! love you lady.

  32. I absolutely agree with you on how important it is to be real and honest and to stay positive (that is something I have noticed about myself, how much more of a positive person I have become, I almost automatically see the good about something bad, and I used to be so different). As for the personality type, I’m an INFP (at least according to a test I did a few years ago, maybe I should do one again!) so similar to you! It seems you are in a pretty good place now, and that is great. 🙂

  33. and this, my dear, is why I read your blog in the first place. I can’t tell you how many blogs I’ve clicked “unsubscribe” too because I’m tired of the perfect lives they live. No one makes cupcakes everyday 😉

  34. Hi Emily,

    I’m pleased to have discovered your blog via The Naked Soul Blog haha! But I am surprised and happy to learn that you are an INFJ like me. The whole big picture, weight of the world on your shoulders, thinking of how to make a difference in the lives of others and so on. I’m glad you chose to be yourself because it’s so difficult to be something you are not. Interestingly, I love history and science fiction as well. Although I have never watched Dr Who, I may do so when I have the chance. Having a TARDIS is always cool. But since we don’t have one then we just have to make the best of our choices in life. Thankfully I have the I-Ching to help me as a guidebook of sorts.

    Anyway, I love empires! Some of the empires I like are as follows; Byzantine, Ottoman, Mongol, Mughal and Persian. I also love the Three Kingdoms Era in China and the Warring States period in Japan. The reason I read history is to learn from it. You know the whole weight of the world thing and how we can learn from lessons in the past so we don’t make them ourselves. Well at least that is how it works for me. I suppose as an INFJ, I have always been deeply impressed with virtuous rulers who cared for the welfare of his people. I am also a big fan of powerful women too. One who comes to mind is Tamar of Georgia in the 1200s. I loved how she brought about the golden age of Georgia, even though it was at the expense of the Byzantines. I also love how her husband, David Soslan was her consort and hence he derived his power through her. Even so, he gave her his full support and campaigned on her behalf. It was a beautiful relationship.

    As for science fiction, I love Star Wars, Star Trek and anything to do with space. I also love spoofs and Galaxy Quest was one of the best spoofs of Star Trek that I watched.

    I happen to be reading Frank Herbert’s Dune right now. And I’m glad I did. Since I have some experience with divination, I was very interested in seeing how the hero handled his prescience. What it was like for him to be aware of all the possibilities and how he dealt with it.

    Hah, pardon me for rambling. It’s nice to find INFJs if you know what I mean.

    Thanks again for your lovely blog!

    Regards,
    Irving aka the Vizier

  35. Hi Emily,
    Wow! Thanks for this.
    I actually went and took the test, thinking that I had done it before but I’m not sure I got the same result? On the other hand I forget things so maybe I did?
    I too am an introverted type. Which is weird because part of me craves attention. I really have no problem whatsoever speaking up like you and yes it has got me into some trouble in the past.
    Thanks for this. It was very enlightening, and you have once again fulfilled your mission and inspired someone!
    Now I have to go away by myself for a bit so that I can think… 🙂

  36. Great post. You definitely sound like an INFJ. I am INTJ but right on the border with INFJ so I relate to a lot of what you said in all areas. I try to promote more about personality types online and that includes not only Myers-Briggs, but also Enneagram (check it out if you haven’t, it gives another type and level of insight).

    Nice coming across your blog.

  37. Pingback: 2010: Brilliance |

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